Proverbs 24:5
Let’s give our attention to the
word of God. This is Proverbs 24 verse five. And it says a
wise man is full of strength and a man of knowledge enhances
his might. So tonight we want to look in
our study of Proverbs at the subject of wisdom and a husband. And unfortunately, or maybe fortunately,
depending on how you look at it, there is no Proverbs 32.
Last week we looked at Proverbs 31, where it gives 20 some verses
on everything a woman ought to be, and hopefully all of you
women left feeling like abject, miserable failures, because nobody
can measure up to the bionic woman of Proverbs 31. So men,
lucky for us, there’s no Proverbs 32. You can be an oaf, and that’s
probably biblical. Nope, that’s not it, right? We
can glean from multiple Proverbs as well as the whole Bible. So
you’re in trouble, you’re not off the hook. And so tonight
I have a 50 point sermon, I’m kidding, on what it means to
be a wise husband. Now, I was trying to figure out
how to do this, and so I looked through some concordances this
week. I looked to see if anybody else had done a study on this,
but I got real scientific and I asked my wife, from Proverbs
and Scripture, from the top of your head and your Bible knowledge,
let’s put it on a sticky note, what do we want for our girls
and a husband that’s biblical? So that’s the scientific thing. So I came up with, I think, 10
or 11 things together with her. They’re in Proverbs, some from
the New Testament, that I want us to think about. We could say
a whole lot more, but this will give you enough to lose sleep
over, particularly your dad’s. You want to get out your Remington
oil and clean your shotgun, but also keep these 10 things in
mind and whatever else comes to mind. I see a lot of young
men in the room. You’ve got some note-taking to do and some aspiring
to do, right? And then those of us who are
husbands, we probably need to leave here tonight in sackcloth
and ashes, repenting of where we have failed and fall short.
But let me set this up by saying a couple overarching thoughts. Wisdom in a husband, the shepherd
of the home, A servant of Almighty God who has strength and not
weakness. A prophet, a priest, a king.
One who is wise and bears the fruit of the Holy Spirit. One
who can provide spiritually and physically and emotionally, not
only for his wife, but also for his children. The proverb says,
blessed is the man who has an excellent wife. She is the crown
to her husband. Her husband rises up and calls
her blessed. He praises her. But what might
we say are praiseworthy things about a husband? about a father,
about the man of the house. I really have come up with 10,
and I fudged an 11th one in there. So I’ll put myself on 1.5x and
try to talk fast. But the first thing is, you need
to be a man who fears Galway, a man who fears the Lord. Proverbs
chapter one, verse seven, we studied several weeks back. The
fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. The flip side of that
passage speaks of foolishness and folly. And so we want for
our daughters, we want to be as young men, we want to be those
who fear the Lord and those who do not follow foolishness. One way ends in life, the other
way ends in death. And if I could ever get to Proverbs,
I was gonna land on chapter 15, verse 33. Here we have it, the fear of
the Lord is instruction and wisdom and humility comes before honor. And then also chapter 22, verse
four, the reward for humility and the fear of the Lord is riches
and honor. and life. And so we want, I’ll
just give a 20 second summary of what we studied the other
week with the fear of the Lord. We want somebody who in their
mind knows who God is, knows what he’s done, knows what he
requires, knows what he’s capable of. His heart then pursues this
life of faith and obedience and worship. And it’s the way this
person interacts with others. But this is a person who believes
God is true, God is trustworthy, God can give and God can take
away, and God can bless and God can curse. And this fear culminates
in our faith in Jesus Christ. We recognize all that God is
has been revealed to us in the face of our Lord Jesus Christ.
And so to fear God and keep his commandments is only done by
faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. But we want to be men. We want
a husband for our daughters. We want to be the marriageable
type who fears Yahweh. Well, the second thing I think
the Proverbs would point us to is we want a young man, an old
man, whatever, who is a hard worker and a provider. I’m not gonna say too much about
the negative side of this, but we don’t want a non-worker and
a non-provider, right? Proverbs chapter 30, verse 25,
says, the ants are a people not strong, yet they provide their
food in the summer. So we want an ant, right? We
want a hard worker, a provider. Chapter 12, verse 27, Whoever is slothful will not
roast his game, but the diligent man will get precious wealth. Chapter 12, verse 11, and then
verse 14. Whoever works his land will have
plenty of bread, but he who follows worthless pursuits lacks sense. You know, you have a young man
come to the house and he’s a dreamer, right? I’m gonna start a business.
But he didn’t get through school too good. That might be one to
run off, that kind of thing. Follows worthless pursuits. He’s
going to record a record or something like that or establish world
peace. Let’s see, what was the other
verse? 14, from the fruit of his mouth, a man is satisfied
with good and the work of a man’s hand comes back to him. So we’re
thinking here, there’s a lot of other verses we could look
up about someone who’s a hard worker and a provider. We want
to be providers financially and yes, there are spiritual and
emotional and other sorts of provisions as well. But someone
who takes initiative, someone who prospers. I think in the
old covenant, before a man could marry, he had to have his house
established. No living on love, right? Although that’s how most of us
get through the early years. But he has his house built, he’s
established. Think about Abraham when he wanted
a son for Isaac. He sent one of his servants off
to the land of his forefathers to Ur of the Chaldeans, and he
sent camels and riches, and when he met a girl that could water
all the donkeys, what did he do? He gave her a bunch of jewelry. He wooed her, and then he brought
her home, and what did Isaac do? He looked up from the field
and said, this must be my wife. The rest is history, and here
we all are children of the faith. But hard workers, one who is
able to provide, may not be camels and rings and all the rest, but
at least financially, because he’s a hard worker and a provider.
A third thing to consider is one who is honest and fair and
truthful, not a cheater. Not a person whose business is
on Yelp and everybody hates him, right? Not of good report. And
I think of the qualifications for elder in 1 Timothy, of good
report. What does the community think
about this person? But one whose lips speak honesty,
who tells the truth. Just a couple of verses, chapter
12, verse 19. Truthful lips endure forever,
but a lying tongue is but for a moment. And then chapter 16,
verse 11, just balance and scales are the Lord’s and all the weights
in the bag are his. It is an abomination to kings
to do evil. And so we want to be not only
honest, but fair. We want to be truthful as well.
Proverbs 26, verse 28, a lying tongue hates its victims and
a flattering mouth works ruin. And so we want to be or find
young men who fear Yahweh. They work hard and provide. They
are honest, fair, and truthful. The fourth thing, and I know
I’m jamming a bunch of words together. That’s really why the
joke is this is a 50-point sermon, because I just put them together. But we want someone who is humble,
wise, respected, and honored. We don’t want to be a man or
to find a young man who is a disgrace. or who has connections and friendships. Chapter 3, verse 35 says this,
the wise will inherit honor, but fools get disgrace. A fifth thing, someone who is
financially responsible, and not just in making money and
managing money, but their money is in submission to the Lord.
Think of Proverbs chapter three, verse nine, honor the Lord with
your wealth, honor the Lord with the first fruits of your produce.
If you do this, then your barns will be filled with plenty and
your vats will be bursting with wine. You know, we joke about
cleaning our shotgun. I already have a list of questions
I’m gonna ask. It’s pretty long, but one of
them is do you tithe? That’s a pretty good question, isn’t
it? Young man, do you tithe? You don’t tithe, but you’re driving
a pretty fancy car there. You don’t tithe and you got every
toy that Best Buy sells or where else do men get their toys? A cat, no, I’m thinking big time.
The outdoor world, you know, the Cabela’s and all the rest. Because that harkens back to
provision, right? A husband who won’t tithe probably
will end up someday not providing for your loved ones. Think of chapter 23, verse four. Warned you we’d be flipping.
Chapter 23, verse four. Do not toil to acquire wealth but be discerning enough to desist.
He’s not a lover of money or not in pursuit of wealth. Let’s see, we read chapter three.
Okay, chapter 1311. I’ll just hit a couple of these. Let the word do the speaking.
1311 says, wealth gained hastily will dwindle. We don’t want a
lottery player or somebody who’s a get rich quicker. But whoever
gathers little by little will increase it. And then chapter
19, verse 14. House and wealth are inherited
from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord. So just a thought
or two about money. You gotta make it, you gotta
manage it, you gotta submit it to the Lord, but money can’t
be the pursuit. money can’t be the or the the
the gathering of wealth can’t be the chief pursuit but also
did you catch it this is kind of a joke but marry somebody
rich right get a little passed down from the rest of the family. It’s wise to look at these things.
It’s wise to look at the attitude towards money, the management
of money, but also the submission of the money before the Lord.
But also, I think it’s a helpful thing to realize, is there extended
family that will be helpful in hardship and lean times? All
right, a sixth thing. I’m not gonna say too much about
this, because we spent a whole night on it several weeks back,
maybe back before Thanksgiving, but Proverbs chapter five, verses
15 to 23. Remind us that we need to be a one woman man. It says,
drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well.
Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the
streets, let them be for yourself alone and not for strangers.
And then it goes on to speak of the delight we should have.
and the wife of our youth. It’s the same thing that Timothy
tells us about the men who are to be deacons and elders in the
church. They need to be a one-woman man. A seventh and important
thing, I believe, is the person ought to be teachable. Chapter
13, verse 12. 18 says, poverty and disgrace come
to him who ignores instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is
honored. And then chapter 29, verse 23. One’s pride will bring him low,
but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor. This ought to be a person who’s
not led astray for one thing, but a person who is led in truth
and wisdom and the blessings that accompany it are a blessing
to the household entirely. All right, the eighth thing is
a person who is generous. And I’m very tempted to say,
and not stingy, But I mean stingy, right? Isn’t that the word that’s
spelled the same? Stingy, stingy? Okay, you don’t want a stingy
man either, but you want someone generous. Chapter 28, verse eight,
whoever multiplies his wealth by interest and profit gathers
it for him who is generous to the poor. Chapter 28, verse 22,
a stingy man, that’s where I was getting that from, a stingy man
hastens after wealth and does not know that poverty will come
upon him. And then chapter 14, verse 21. 1421, whoever despises his neighbor
as a sinner, but blessed is he who is generous to the poor.
And then 1431, whoever oppresses a poor man insults his maker,
but he who is generous to the needy honors him. And then 1917
is a wonderful verse. I think many of you probably
know the spirit of it, whoever is generous to the poor lends
to the Lord, and he will repay him for his deed. And then one
last word on generosity, chapter 11, verse 25. Whoever brings blessing will
be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered. And then the ninth, self-control. This is a fruit of the Holy Spirit.
something that covers a lot of categories. It can cover categories
such as alcohol or substance abuse. It can cover things like
rage or temper. Chapter 25, verse 28, a man without
self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls. Chapter 14, verse 17, let’s see
if I can, Flip fast enough here, 14, 17, a man of quick temper
acts foolishly and a man of evil devices is hated. And then chapter 14, verse 29,
whoever is slow to anger has great understanding or forbearance,
but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly. And the last thing,
the 10th thing, actually it’s the next to last thing, because
I have an 11th, but I was gonna fudge it in as the conclusion. So fear
not, the end is near. A person ought to have confidence. Chapter three, verse 25. Do not be afraid of sudden terror.
Do not be afraid of the ruin of the wicked when it comes.
For the Lord will be your confidence and he will keep your foot. from
being caught. And then chapter 14, verse 26. In the fear of the Lord, one
has strong confidence in his children will have a refuge. And so a person ought to be confident,
confident in the Lord, confident in his provision, his promises,
his blessings. and even content even when the
world seems to be falling apart. And so a husband, a father, a
prophet, a priest, a king. I promised you one last thing,
an 11th thing, so to speak. We want to be someone who passes
along the my son statements. Remember how Proverbs began,
my son, this is the way to live, or my son, this is the way to
die. And so we certainly want one
over the other. But we also want someone not
just to pass along the my son statements of the wisdom literature,
but the truth of the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. It really
is something that has to come from mom and dad. And often in
houses we see it comes from mom, not dad. but the fear of Yahweh
and love and resting in Christ alone for salvation is something. So this is my humble offering
to you men. May God’s grace give you the
ability to live these things. Young men, start working on it.
Don’t be 28 and playing video games and girls saying, there
are just no guys, good guys around. Don’t be those kinds of people.
And If you got a house full of girls, which some of you do,
go to the home improvement store, buy your gun oil, but also get
out your Bible and look at these things. And you young ladies,
if mom and dad say no, you better listen to them. I can’t tell
you how much heartache I have had as a minister dealing with
family problems. And you look at the young lady
who’s in great distress and say, did mom and dad tell you no?
And they very often say, yes, yes, they did. And the heartache
from there passes on to the generation. So may God give us grace to listen
up, listen good, and put these things into practice in our lives.
Pray with me. Lord, we give you thanks that
your word is so clear to us, instructing us on how to live
wisely in a foolish world. And we pray that these things
we have talked about and the others that we did not but that
appear on the pages of scripture would be evident in our lives
as men and women and boys and girls, but especially as men
of the home and help us and give us grace in Jesus name, amen.